Random thoughts:
-I don't care what VH1 and Blender says, Chicago's "You're My Inspiration" is a great song.
-Ice-T is going to produce a rap album for David Hasselhoff. That sound you hear is what's left of Ice-T's credibility being flushed down the toilet.
-I don't know if even the Germans would buy a David Hasselhoff rap album.
-The most mindboggling mystery in my life right now is: (cue David Ackroyd) Who is Little Kelly? Is she married? Does she have a boyfriend? Would she consider dating a younger man like me?
(Little Kelly, for those of you that don't know, is this super hot Asian chick at work. She's got to be one of the .02% of Asian women in the world that doesn't have a two-dimensional ass, and believe me, that's a plus.)
-Speaking of mysteries and hotties from work, what ever happened to Little Sis? Did she go the way of Helen? Will we ever see her again?
-The Anglican church is debating whether to allow Charles to marry Camilla, a divorcee. Pardon me, but doesn't the Anglican church owe its very existence to a desire for more freedom when it comes to divorce?
-If I've said it once, I've said it a million times: I'd take the brunette Bush twin over the blonde one any day of the week. (Yes, I know their names, but I simply feel wrong saying "Barbara Bush is hot.") Jenna comes off as a bit of a sowhority drunk. Barbara seems more of a dinner-and-a-movie type. Anyway, that's my two cents on that.
-CJ Carnacchio should really trademark the word "sowhority" like Pat Reilly trademarked the word "three-peat." He'd make a bundle of money, from me alone.
-So how many elbows to the head from Karl Malone will it take for Rasheed Wallace to wig out?
-Apparently, some Indian steel tycoon is blowing $55 million on his daughter's wedding, part of which will go to the cost of renting out the Palace of Versaille. Yes, he's renting out the Palace of Versaille. Yes, apparently, the palace that nearly bankrupted France with the costs of its construction and helped bring about the revolution, is available for weddings, and presumably for bar mitzvahs and proms too. Actually, probably not bar mitzvahs, considering the French hate Jews.
-If I had that much to spend on a wedding, I'd rent out Yankee Stadium, and hire the Love Unlimited Orchestra and Def Leppard to play for the reception. Actually, come to think of it, I wouldn't need that much money to get the Love Unlimited Orchestra and Def Leppard to pay at a wedding.
-Speaking of Indian weddings, you know how some people propose to their girlfriends at ball games over the jumbotron? Do you think in India, they announce arranged marriages over their equivalent of the jumbotron? Does the marriage broker go up there and announce it? Am I the only one who thinks that something like that would be hilarious?
-One day, if I ever get to own a baseball team, I'm going to hold Lame Intro Music Night. You know how the PA system plays music when players come up at bat? Well, I'm going to replace that music with really lame songs. Not inappropriate songs, like a Carpenters' song, but a song that may have been cool to use as intro music ten to fifteen years ago, but is totally lame today. The kind of song where if you heard it as intro music, you wouldn't be confused, but you'd start laughing your ass off. I was thinking that "The Final Countdown," "Everybody's Working for the Weekend," and "OPP" would HAVE to be included. Again, am I the only person who thinks that this would be absolutely hilarious?
-I don't care what VH1 and Blender says, Chicago's "You're My Inspiration" is a great song.
-Ice-T is going to produce a rap album for David Hasselhoff. That sound you hear is what's left of Ice-T's credibility being flushed down the toilet.
-I don't know if even the Germans would buy a David Hasselhoff rap album.
-The most mindboggling mystery in my life right now is: (cue David Ackroyd) Who is Little Kelly? Is she married? Does she have a boyfriend? Would she consider dating a younger man like me?
(Little Kelly, for those of you that don't know, is this super hot Asian chick at work. She's got to be one of the .02% of Asian women in the world that doesn't have a two-dimensional ass, and believe me, that's a plus.)
-Speaking of mysteries and hotties from work, what ever happened to Little Sis? Did she go the way of Helen? Will we ever see her again?
-The Anglican church is debating whether to allow Charles to marry Camilla, a divorcee. Pardon me, but doesn't the Anglican church owe its very existence to a desire for more freedom when it comes to divorce?
-If I've said it once, I've said it a million times: I'd take the brunette Bush twin over the blonde one any day of the week. (Yes, I know their names, but I simply feel wrong saying "Barbara Bush is hot.") Jenna comes off as a bit of a sowhority drunk. Barbara seems more of a dinner-and-a-movie type. Anyway, that's my two cents on that.
-CJ Carnacchio should really trademark the word "sowhority" like Pat Reilly trademarked the word "three-peat." He'd make a bundle of money, from me alone.
-So how many elbows to the head from Karl Malone will it take for Rasheed Wallace to wig out?
-Apparently, some Indian steel tycoon is blowing $55 million on his daughter's wedding, part of which will go to the cost of renting out the Palace of Versaille. Yes, he's renting out the Palace of Versaille. Yes, apparently, the palace that nearly bankrupted France with the costs of its construction and helped bring about the revolution, is available for weddings, and presumably for bar mitzvahs and proms too. Actually, probably not bar mitzvahs, considering the French hate Jews.
-If I had that much to spend on a wedding, I'd rent out Yankee Stadium, and hire the Love Unlimited Orchestra and Def Leppard to play for the reception. Actually, come to think of it, I wouldn't need that much money to get the Love Unlimited Orchestra and Def Leppard to pay at a wedding.
-Speaking of Indian weddings, you know how some people propose to their girlfriends at ball games over the jumbotron? Do you think in India, they announce arranged marriages over their equivalent of the jumbotron? Does the marriage broker go up there and announce it? Am I the only one who thinks that something like that would be hilarious?
-One day, if I ever get to own a baseball team, I'm going to hold Lame Intro Music Night. You know how the PA system plays music when players come up at bat? Well, I'm going to replace that music with really lame songs. Not inappropriate songs, like a Carpenters' song, but a song that may have been cool to use as intro music ten to fifteen years ago, but is totally lame today. The kind of song where if you heard it as intro music, you wouldn't be confused, but you'd start laughing your ass off. I was thinking that "The Final Countdown," "Everybody's Working for the Weekend," and "OPP" would HAVE to be included. Again, am I the only person who thinks that this would be absolutely hilarious?
posted by J. Yeh | 21:50
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home